AYOE 17 / Reflecting On 2023, My Year of Experiments & Life in General

Hi friends! Long time no chat 😬

I mentioned it before, but it’s been really interesting to observe how this whole Year of Experiments project has unfolded. 2022 Nic had no idea the shitstorm she was going to stir up for 2023 Nic 😂

I’ve experienced resistance at having some kind of structure imposed on my time, even though I’m the one who chose the structure. But I’ve also wrestled with not finishing something I said I would do. (it’s a WILD place in my brain!🎢)

I don’t know if you’re anything like me, but I often guilt or shame myself into doing things because I committed to someone else and I HATE letting other people down.

But the flip side of that is - how many times have I essentially let myself down or ignored what I needed in order to keep my word to someone else? Probably more than I even realize.

SO!

Instead of forcing myself to push through and pick something for October and November I just…let it be.

And I reminded myself that skipping 2 months doesn’t need to have some big meaning except that I chose not to force something that wasn’t inspiring me.

Sometimes it’s ok to let things go. To quit. To lose interest or motivation in something you were once excited about.

Being human is fascinating isn't it? 🤪

If you’ve made it this far, then you may be wondering what’s next. And lucky you, I’ve got an answer for you…

My December Experiment

To be completely honest - it pains me a bit to choose something so cliché, BUT I’ve been feeling a bit reflective recently.

Maybe it’s realizing my teenager is going to be a legal adult in less than 2 years. 😭 Maybe it’s realizing that my parents are nearing their 70’s, my husband is nearing his 50’s and I’m inching closer to being mid-40’s. Maybe it’s the normal curse of middle age where you naturally become more aware of your own mortality.

Whatever it is - I’m feeling the desire to spend this month reflecting on not just this past year, but honestly my life in general.

So I’ll be doing 31 Days of Reflection for my last experiment for 2023.

I have no idea what will come of it, but I’m not limiting myself to something like one trite gratitude statement each day. Instead I’ll be reflecting on the people, places, experiences, lessons, and yes even mistakes that I’ve experienced in my life so far.

I went back and forth about whether this is something I want to share on socials or not, but I ultimately I decided that my reflection itself will be more of a brain dump journaling exercise, and I’ll pull the topic or a brief summary to share in my end-of-experiment post here.

With the holidays this month plus the weird vibe I get from X these days 😬, I don’t really want to spend more time on social media right now. Sorry not sorry if that seems totally lame. 🤷‍♀️

Ok that’s all from me for now. I hope you have a fantastic holiday season - no matter what you celebrate 💗

xx- Nic